Deciding to divorce can be a long and agonizing process. Once the case is initiated, what was conceptual will become real. Your divorce doesn’t have to be contentious. Many couples prefer to maintain civility with one another and end their marriage as peacefully as possible. However, it’s not always easy to predict how emotional the process may become. Divorce can be stressful, and even those who intend to cooperate can lose perspective. The good news is that there are ways to help minimize tension and disputes during your case. Here are 6 ways to help keep your Wisconsin divorce low conflict:
- Being Flexible and Cooperative When Possible
During divorce, you will have to make numerous decisions that will impact you and your ex’s immediate and long-term circumstances. There may be some matters where you have fundamental disagreements. However, there will also be times when compromise is possible and reasonable. Being flexible and cooperative, when possible, can help you and your ex manage issues more efficiently and with less conflict.
- Keeping Interactions Constructive
Divorce can be painful and emotional, even when both parties are trying to keep things amicable. Sometimes, what may start out as a routine conversation can quickly escalate into an argument. Do what you can to keep your conversations and tone neutral. If you and your ex have a hard time talking without fighting, it may help to keep your interactions to a minimum. You may also want to consider your objectives before seeing or talking with your former spouse. By doing what you can to keep your interactions constructive, you may be able to help reduce conflict.
- Maintaining Appropriate Boundaries
Going from being in a committed relationship with someone to becoming legal adversaries can be a difficult transition. The shift from freely sharing information as a couple to becoming former spouses can be abrupt. As you transition into your new roles and dynamics, it will help to establish appropriate boundaries. You are moving towards building separate lives, and it’s important to honor one another’s space and privacy when possible. By keeping healthy limits, you may be able to avoid unnecessary conflict.
- Not Contributing to Disputes
Depending on your circumstances, you and your ex may be at odds over numerous issues. For example, you may disagree about when your kids should be picked up for placement time or where your pet should reside. Divorce provides endless opportunities to argue. Not every disagreement will be productive, and it’s important to recognize when your contribution will and will not be useful. If possible, take a step back, assess the conflict, and do what you can to avoid making matters more contentious.
- Choosing a Low-Conflict Divorce Model
When people think of divorce, they may imagine dramatic courtroom fights. However, most divorce cases never make it to trial. Instead, there are various ways for couples to resolve their issues. One option is to use Collaborative Divorce. This divorce model allows parties to work cooperatively with specially trained Collaborative Divorce attorneys and neutral professionals to understand their issues and settle their cases. There is also the option of working with a neutral third party mediator to reach a settlement during Divorce Mediation. Both Collaborative Divorce and Divorce Mediation provide the parties with an opportunity to evaluate their disputed terms and find ways to reach a resolution with less conflict.
- Seeking Professional Help
Going through a divorce can be difficult for everyone involved. You, your ex, and your kids are all going through significant life changes that can be challenging to navigate. Having the support of a professional such as a therapist or divorce coach may help you process your emotions as you go through the case. Your family may also benefit from attending individual or group counseling. You may also want to consider joining a divorce support group. By working with therapeutic professionals, you can help manage your emotions. In addition, having a safe space to process your feelings may make it easier for you to maintain focus and avoid emotional conflict.
Working with a Low-Conflict Attorney
One of the best ways to help minimize disputes during your divorce is by working with a low-conflict divorce attorney. A lawyer who takes a low-conflict approach will know how to help you get through your case with as little fighting as possible. In addition, your attorney can help you identify issues and divorce options that support your goals and reduce conflict.
Contact an Experienced Wisconsin Divorce Attorney
Wisconsin Attorney and Mediator Karyn Youso of First Look Family Law is a low-conflict divorce attorney and Mediator with over 30 years of experience helping clients understand their options during divorce. If you have a divorce case in Metro Milwaukee, please contact us today and let us take a “first look” at your situation.